An interlude . . .

   Before reading, I assign you a task of taking stock of what is in your fridge. I find the contents of one's fridge is always in direct relation to one is doing in her/his life. (please note this mostly applies to singletons) Mine contains: an old to-go container of honey mustard, corn tea I made and poured into an old Coke Zero 1 liter bottle (no Emily, I aint off the juice yet), and dreams- make your own assumptions.

     I have found my first restless sensations here in Korea. They told me it was coming  (they being the foreigners which have been here awhile). I just thought I was impervious to these demons. Not so much the case, but to that effect, I should note that they have been peripheral at best but for the first time today I thought: damn what would I do for deli? I mean 'where do I turn left and get outta Chinatown?' ( I say this in humor with the ignorance I might have thrown around not 5 months ago. ) And with the realization that there is no escape from my Asian-ness of being, I felt claustrophobic yet simultaneously felt alone- alone not like my dog  just died alone, but alone like a square peg amongst a bunch of round holes. It was like the sensation I had realizing that I am crowded amongst molecules but spacious amongst universes. (Yup, had to think a few times before composing that thought. )

  Perhaps, in a way, I have lived my life thus far according to everything I ever learned on 'Sesame Street'. Not a bad place to grow up- I might add. Those of us in this generation of television education are very familiar with the "One thing is not like the other" Well I can say, in all honesty and with out regard for consequence, is me. 

   That being said: I know that I am not anywhere with out someone wanting to be apart of my experience. Lending a helping hand for the brief moment of speaking English or I donno be closer to what- I just know that if I am standing in the rain umbrella-less at a stop light waiting to cross- I am always offered shelter from a nearby person even when everyone else is not- and in that way its not so bad . . . really.