You haven't seen someone get hit by a car yet?

     It was an early late evening, my director had offered to drive me to preview my apartment (as I am still temporarily living at another teacher's place.) On the way, the traffic slowed to a crawl. A plethera of reflective police officers were waving flash lights directing traffic through a road block. My director explained that these are nightly drunk driving check points that happen spontaneously in different parts of the city. Our vehicle is directed to an officer who holds out a mechanical breathalyser, she rolls her window down and blows a determined gust into it waits for the OK, which is given, and we quickly speed away. It was uncomfortable and serious. There is a no tolerance policy of drinking and driving in Korea and this his how they combat something that has reached almost epidemic proportions. Koreans drink, they drink a lot. They now, however, will not drink, drive and kill people anymore. 

   Driving in general is a dangerous thing in Korea. One of the teachers asked me the other day if I had seen anyone get hit by a car yet, and was surprised when I said I hadn't (I've only been here 6 days!) Can't say I'm looking forward to that experience in the slightest.

  After the showing of the studio, we went to get some coffee at a local coffee shop. The clerk at the counter was of was a very enthusiastic business owner and was intent on sharing his coffee roasting knowledge with us. After a few "Nice to meet you"s He kept approaching out table with coffee beans in hand and talking endlessly about how his roasting process was best. (all which had to be translated) He sincerely was passionate about his beans. We had to feel the beans, smell the beans, taste the beans . . . His perseverance was teetering between comic and overbearing, but I am sure it will not be the last time I will encounter this sort of exuberance. There is a quality of pride in your work here that you do not find too often in the states.    

Even the McDonald's aint 'Merican . . .

    As part of my immigration process, I was informed yesterday that a medical examination would need to be performed in order to make sure I am healthy, undiseased, and drug free. The most disconcerting part of this news was that the examination included the most dreaded medical procedure for all women: the pap spear. (even the word is ugly). This was most upsetting news on many levels mostly because when I inquired about how the "hoo hoo" check goes down in Korea all testimonials the women shared with me were most unsettling. The most ancedotal story entails "a slap on the ass in short paper skirt." Needless to say, I was not looking foward to this. I had a problem with this exam on principle as well. Seems that the wae-gooks (forienger in Korea) men go through a STD blood check but the wae-gook women got to drop trough and spread eagle for their STD check. It is, as many things are in this country, very, very sexist. But the fact of the matter that if I want to stay in Korea, I gotta swallow my feminist pride and do what needs to be done regardless of my position on the matter or how violated I feel as result of it. This is a hard realization, but I imagine it is the first of many situations that will leave me feeling grateful for my freedoms and equalities provided to me. Most that, until now, I have been practically unaware. This sort of mentality is making this whole situation a little more palatable. That or it really it is us easy U.S.  ladies and our dirty hoo hoos' that are spreading the "love disease" all of God's green Korea.

     Any how, after all this mental and emotional preparation, we arrive at the hospital only to be discover that they had recently changed the laws and the pap is no longer a component of the immigration medical exam (apparently too many women complained). I sighed with relief of the greatest proportion. 

     The most exciting the part of the trip to the hospital for the wae-gooks was the ride home which required a brief but neccesary detour to the one of the few semi-American experiences in town, McDonald's. There are a few differences between Korean and American McD's. First off, there is nothing fast about the fast food here. One teacher told me how she waited 45 mins for her egg McMuffin once. They do not have double cheeseburgers but they do have a spicy "shang-hai" burger which is chicken. (?) They do not have fish-filet, but they do have, and brace yourself, a shrimp burger. It is possibly the most disgusting thing I have ever tasted in my life. Just thinking about is making me vomit a little in my mouth. If ever in Asia- just don't, just don't.... 

Yes, Virgina, that is a real live octopus.

    It was one of the most delicious and surreal dining experiences of my life. Dinner among natives and locals in a seamless dance of drink and eat. We remove our shoes at the door (of course) and climb into a low rise table which has a cooking range right in the middle of. Almost immediately we are served a variety of local fare which I have to inquire about each dish because I don't recognize anything that is put in front of me. It is all clean, flavorful and fresh, fresh, fresh tasting. With in a few bites of some sort of creamed urchin our server appears with a giant wok filled to the brim with an impressive collection of seafood, most of which was still alive. The part that made me the most uneasy was the octopus which was wriggling wildly in its last attempt of life. The gas burner was whisked to high and the herbaceous broth quickly began to boil as I tried not to notice the tentacles of the creature in front of me slowing in what seemed like forever to a still. This may seem upsetting to some, it was in fact upsetting to me (quietly) but I am here to understand a culture, experience a culture, NOT judge. We cook live lobsters, we eat live oysters, we . . . . well I'm trying to understand, but after a few bites of my "seafood casserole" what I would liken to a ciopinno, I had forgotten about the entire horrific slaughter in front of me. The meal was HOT and SPICY but drink was served in LITTLE glasses and NOT refilled. My host instructed me to receive drink in the Korean manner which was with holding your glass in front of you with two hands. Why this is I will still have to inquire. The little amount of drink with meal is something I have noticed since dining in Korea. When I asked about this phenomenon, I was informed that Koreans have a sort of mythological philosophy when it comes to eating: the hotter the food, the spicier the food, the better it is for your body. They also believe drinking is for after the meal because your body will rid itself of all the calories you ingested earlier, easier. Perhaps this is a new diet tactic I will have to try? Dessert was served in a bowl. It was an aromatic liquid of persimmon and cinnamon and was slurped down loudly and quickly. YUM. It tasted like love. There is no "splitting the bill" in Korea, in fact I never even notice a bill or exchange of money it is just magically paid for. My hosts are two Korean women from my school and the headmaster who, as always, said very little. I have noticed in most cases men and women do not socialize much in public. As we abruptly (literally mid sentence) left the table for coffee somewhere else . . .  one of the women that was with me says quietly to me that in Korea they have a saying . .  "if gathering with many women and one man, bring dish." 

"Class, meet new Amy Teacher"

"Hello, Amy Teacher!" they all say in unison as I am always introduced to a new class. As the students are starting to recognize me in the hallways and classrooms of school they are also calling out to me across parking lots and from street corners in town"Hello,  Amy Teacher!" It is not just students who have this response to my blonde hair and volumptous frame which immediately identify me as American, the community too. The coffee clerk, the grocery store attendant, the old man smoking tabacco on the corner will all stop what there doing and call out "Hello, nice to meet you!" It is quite endearing really. But I am aware now that I am no longer an anonymous face in the crowd. In this place, where ever I go and whatever I do people know immediately I aint from around here.  

Morning Rain in Suncheon

And its only day two . . .

     Well the pot roast turned out to be delicious . .  . the next day. We spent the evening smoking cigarettes in the stairwell and drinking "white beer" and soju while discussing the best and worse of Korea. Apparently I have avoided a lot of the pitfalls most Americans encounter when coming to this country on an esl endeavor (english as a second language), which i must "thank my lucky stars " for.  I have heard some real horror stories about abusive hagwons (private teaching institutions) and some shocking cultural differences that can be quite traumatizing if one is not prepared. Its not that it is everywhere, I am just made to be aware from the start that we are not in Kansas anymore. The teacher I am living with shared with me a colorful story of her first and second year in South Korea. 

      It involved a wretched fight with her old boss over last months pay and a legal document they unknowingly signed claiming that if they did not complete their year contract, no matter what the circumstance, they would have to leave Korea FOREVER and never, ever come back. (dramatic, I know) They fought it, and won and are still here- six years later. The following year she was put into a nice house with her sister and they lived happily until they came to alarming conclusion that their korean welcoming party was a man who had a serious and committed ritual of masturbating out their window on a regular basis. She said she new she was sexy when she washed the dishes, but this was extreme. Apparently it got much worse when he began to, for lack of better words, expunge his bowls on their lawn whenever he was discovered by the young American women. This was not OK. They also fought for this. They called the police which replied casually "oh, it must be the heat." So they moved. The advice to be headed here is that it is best in Korea to live in large apartment buildings which are EVERYWHERE that have posted security guards which eliminate any possibility of this sort of thing happening  . . . . again I repeat they are still here, six years later. There was another story that I was told that could be best summed up with a man, a pig, a hammer, and a pick up truck and I think you can draw your own conclusions. needless to say: there are no guns in Korea with out complicated and arduous permits, which is a good thing, right? 

   I have made a shocking accidental discovery that even Oprah exists in Korea. My temporary roommate leaves the TV on 24hours a day so that when "mama's not home" her babies (dogs) have company. As I was getting ready this morning I heard here familiar voice emanating through the family room . . . is that Oprah or God? I am still unsure if I was relieved or alarmed. 

 

So here I am in Korea

    It is not true what they say . . .  Korea does not smell like Kimchi. The air seems clean but I was unnerved at encountering a few woman covered in from head to toe in cloaking garments including face mask but was assured that it is purely a cosmetic attempt keep their porcelain white skin.  I have, however, been instructed to not drink the water.  

   The teacher assigned to my "acclimation" took me on a short walk from school to lunch. On the way we past many street vendors selling brightly colored fruits, vegetables and wares. We stopped into a little place that she informed me was the equivalent of a Korean Diner. The menu was immediately handed to us by the server and was a piece of paper that listed each dish in Korean, prices with a pencil for checking which dish you would like. The teacher quickly checked a few boxes and handed the menu back to the server.  I noticed people were staring at us from behind there large slurping spoons as my company talked loudly on her cell phone as and I inspected my silver chop sticks. Lunch arrived as pickled kimchi, radish, soup of soy and spinach, and an entree of a bowl lunch of cold noodles and vegetables, and boiled egg on a bed of crushed ice. She told me to mix the entire bowl together ice and all. The ice at first seemed strange in a dish but I realized it was the perfect way to create a sauce in a dish meanwhile keeping it very cold. It was delicious and unlike anything I had ever tasted before. 

    We walked back to the New York School for English and I saw the school for the first time. It is a colorful building in teal, mustard, and orange. We take off our shoes before entering any building and replace them with "house slippers". There is a coed bathroom. I meet the other english instructors, who are charismatic and all seem happy with their jobs (which is relieving). One instructor asks me how my first 24hours are going in Korea and I say well in which he replies "well did you eat scrodem? Cause that's what happened to me my first day here." Which I found to be a very peculiar introduction but he assured me it was entirely accidental. We ended up making plans later that day to have some "dog soup" but not the ribs those seemed to be to expensive. 

    I sat in on some classes. The morning class of kindergartens was a "multi-media" class where the students interacted a power point game. Let's just say I saw a fox eat sin. The class ended with some fun time of commercials on utube but all that we watched were stopped in the middle/beginning due to inappropriate content which was hysterical in itself. Afternoon class was for the older kids and class consisted of conversational english and a well balanced blend of seriously learning and outbursts of laughter. I discovered today that it is complicated to understand the age of a Korean person for they are two years older than we would consider them to be: one year for the year you are in your mom's belly and the other is calculated when the Chinese new year begins. This is confusing to me but the notable part of this is that the 6 year olds look like 4 year olds and the 8 year olds look like 6 year olds and so on. 

    I am staying with the American instructor who has been incredibly  informative about my transformation into Korean life. One of the more peculiar components of this culture is that it is completely unacceptable to smoke as a woman in public. Now if you are in a bar it is fine, but people will be offended if you are smoking on the street- which means one is often encountering women in stairwells and restrooms puffing down a quick one. She said that it would be a typical response of a women who was caught red-handed with vile cigarette in hand to throw it down stomp it out and cough like it was the first inhale of smoke they had ever had. She also said however that it is perfectly fine for woman to drink and get as drunk as they want . .  . strange. When I inquired about female reproductive here care she said you were more likely to encounter abortions over birth control- it was cheaper. 

   In the apartment I am staying is home the teacher's two dogs: an enthusiastic Pomeranian and what she titled as a "tweeny weeny" dog (between mini and regular wiener dog size) which is funny to me for matters that should not be discussed here. 

   Tonight I will be enjoying the least authentically Korean dish imaginable: pot roast, curry and beer prepared by my American host. An eclectic beginning to say the least.